Just thinking...from Kansas City!

We have been in Kansas City since July 24th, and we are just loving it! We love the time with family and friends and watching Nathan get to know his extended family much better. It only took him a few days to warm up to everyone and become a little explorer in my parents' house.

The visit started a bit rocky, but it's better now. Most of you have probably read about this on facebook, but I use our blog as a kind of journal for us, so I want to document things before I forget them.

The week of finals, we got an unexpected surprise: we were pregnant with #2! We weren't expecting this at all; we weren't even trying for a baby. We were going to start trying in the next few months, but not yet! Because I'm done with school in April, we had decided to shoot for a due date of June-ish...this due date was March 28th, about 2 weeks before finals and graduation. We were going to just have to make it work, but it wasn't going to be easy. We were still in quite a shock when we told Mitch's parents right before we left for KC. They were in Rexburg and made it possible to tell both our parents in person. 

As soon as we got in the car with my dad to drive home from the airport, we told him our little secret. In a house full of women, my dad is sometimes the last to know something, so we wanted him to help us tell everyone our surprise.

However, about an hour after we got to my parents' house and put Nathan down for a nap, I went to the bathroom and realized I'd started bleeding. For anyone whose been through a pregnancy, bleeding is either 1) labor is coming, or 2) NOT a good sign. I quickly googled a lady doctor in my parents' area, we made some lame excuse to leave Nathan and "go for a drive", and we went off to the doctor. My anxiety was awful, and I was just sure it was all over. 

We found out that my BYU-Idaho student insurance networked with another insurance company that this doctor accepted! Sweet!! We didn't know what to expect as far as insurance went, but we are so glad that the doctor we randomly picked would allow our insurance to pay 80% of all our expenses! We still haven't seen bills, as they are being sent back to Rexburg, but we are hoping that what we're making in KC will cover everything.

Anyway, we had all kinds of tests and ultrasounds done, and after 3 hours of being at the doctor, we found out we had most likely miscarried. They told us that 1 in 4 women bleed in early pregnancy and keep their babies, but my gut feeling just told me it was over.

It was really hard the first couple of times I had to tell people and say it all out loud...my poor mother-in-law can attest to this after I fell apart telling her over the phone.

After talking to a few people, including one of my best friends, Amy, who had just gone through a much worse miscarriage, I started to feel a lot better. It's amazing how fast I got attached to something (someone) that I wasn't even expecting. During my counseling for PTSD last fall, my counselor helped me channel any oncoming flashbacks or panic attacks fueled by my experience delivering Nathan into planning the next baby. Down to every detail, I was just supposed to think timelines, names, what I want to do differently, what I know more of now that I've had a baby, etc. So, our second baby has been "in the works" (in my head) since Nathan was about 10 months old. 

I don't really know how to wrap this blog post up, but we did find out later (after many more tests) that I had, in fact, lost the pregnancy. I'm feeling optimistic about everything. We were actually VERY lucky. The ultrasound indicated that it could very well be an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy, which is a complication much larger than a normal miscarriage. We never saw a baby, we never heard a heartbeat, and we lost the pregnancy early enough that I didn't have to have any procedures done afterwards. These are all good things; it was very cut and dry, and ran as smoothly as possible. I had no pain or discomfort, just exhaustion and a couple of other uncomfortable symptoms. 

We are so grateful for all the prayers and support we received during all of this. We could really feel the love and support of not only our loved ones and friends, but we also felt a great deal of comfort from the Lord. It really taught me a lot. Even though this was a hard experience, I am so grateful that we went through it. It really made me realize my appreciation for Nathan and I have been able to focus on his sweet self much more than I felt like I did before.

Well, I have a lot of laundry waiting, and I should probably do a few chores while I'm here with a sleeping toddler! I never realize how messy my kiddo can get until he makes a mess in someone else's home! Thanks for reading and lending support!

Finally My Turn for a Field Trip!

Mitch is a lucky duck. He has tons of trips for his Recreation Management major. Most of them involve camping somewhere remote with nothing but a tarp and the clothes on his back, but he still has a blast.

When my teacher presented a fantastic opportunity for our class that involved a day trip to Salt Lake City, UT (about 4 hours from Rexburg), I jumped on it. It was MY turn to go on a little trip while Mitch had Nathan duty all day! Thank heavens his end-of-the-semester schedule lined up well enough for me to go! 

(Nathan did have to spend about half an hour at work with Mitch because one of our speakers went over, but when the Governor of Utah is speaking to you, there's nothing you can really do to tell him to hush so your group can get on the road!)

Anyway, the highlights of this trip were:

- A private meeting with Sister Elaine S. Dalton, General Young Women President for our church. She counsels to all the young women, ages 12-18, in our worldwide church. She lives in Salt Lake City with our other church leaders and has nearly daily interactions with our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson. It was a privilege to meet with her.

-Private counsel from the governor of Utah all about how we can be better advocates for children and families all over the country, and what we can do to get involved in legislation at any level.

-A meeting with some of the ladies of United Families International, a group that lobbies at the UN for family-friendly policies. They shocked us when they said that 95% of documents presented in front of the UN were harmful to children in some way! Sadly, a lot of funding is offered in exchange of the control of children's and parents' rights.

-A tour of the Utah State Capitol Building, which was stunning!

It was a fantastic opportunity, and we had a great time. Our group was about 20-30 people (I can't remember how many actually ended up coming!), and I got to play with my camera all day! It was awesome. 

Here are some pictures I took, and some of my notes from the day.

 

"My hope is that every woman and every young woman become an articulate advocate. This will help you in every part of your life!" --Elaine S. Dalton

(Isn't she just so cute and dainty?)

"The single most pervasive threat to the family is sexual immorality in all of its forms." --Elaine S. Dalton

"A return to virtue could be a return to family." --Elaine S. Dalton

Sister Dalton and our group, in a room known as the "Elect Lady Room", commemorating all the women who have served in general positions in our church

"Contention is always wrong, even if you're right!" --Gary R. Herbert, Governor of Utah

Utah State Capitol Building

"You are entitled to your own opinions, but not your own facts." (Meaning you can't just make stuff up)

--Gary R. Herbert

"A well thought-out letter or phone call can make a huge difference at the state level." --Gary R. Herbert

"Every document that is signed by the UN will enter every country, and internationally signed documents can and will override any country's constitutions." --Kelly from United Families International

"The business of politics is about building relationships. The more relationships you have, the more influence you have at any level: local, state, or federal." --Ron Michelo, State Budget Director for the state of Utah

Overall, this was a fantastic trip. Sister Dalton looked right at me and said this:

"This is not a hopeless situation; you will change the world! You need not become discouraged over this."

...that was exactly what me and my flaming amounts of anxiety needed! 

Throughout this class (Child and Family Advocacy), we are learning all about public policy and how our society is becoming less and less family-oriented, and trying to dissolve the family unit altogether. This makes me a bit stressed out, and my teacher knows it. I know that in the end, right will prevail. 

Just as a note, I am conservative...as if anyone couldn't figure that out. I have an extremely family-oriented perspective of life, and my little family makes me who I am; I don't know what I would do without them! 

I will always defend family rights in this country.

On another note, I love that we live in a country where we can all have our own opinions. We get to vote. We get to have so many freedoms that other countries could never dream of. I will never hate anyone because of their opinion. I have been raised with the goal of becoming Christlike. This isn't something I can achieve in this life alone, but I wouldn't be doing my part to get there if I were acting as a bigot towards those who have different opinions than I do. This election year has been stressful on everyone, and we have a long way to go before this presidential election is over! I hate going "all political" on people, and I also hate to see when respect isn't even part of a discussion.

Here are some more pictures I took at our church's Salt Lake City Temple.

(Don't judge, I'm really not very good at taking pictures of things; and it was quite dreary outside that day!)

I don't feel like writing, so...

Here are some bullet points to catch you guys up.

No new pictures, sorry. I've been too busy taking and editing pictures of other people's children!

Which is okay, because it means a bit of extra income, and being able to do what I love to do.

I've had lots of newborn shoots lately, which are the best.

The last shoot was with a little guy who was 4 weeks old who would make eye contact and smile at me for family pictures...are you kidding!? 

So, naturally, I felt the need to take 750 pictures of him during that shoot. It was a combo shoot at a special rate, with indoor (studio) and outdoor pictures all in one appointment, so it was justified. And really fun. And will be a beast to edit/sort through. But I can't wait!!

We are doing well! Finals are approaching and we are knee deep in the trenches of schoolwork. 

Nathan is getting more and more independent and is learning about consequences. Like when you get stuck between mom's sewing machine and the corner cabinet (it sits there b/c that cabinet is impossible to attach a baby lock to and he once spilled a 5 lb bag of flour all over everything in there...it's also impossible to get inside the cabinet to clean it out, unless you're Nathan's size...), mom and dad make you get out by yourself. He's attempted it less lately! Woo hoo!

Oh, don't pretend like we're cruel. We're not. He wasn't that stuck.

Anyway, 

We have exactly 10 school days left in the semester. WOW. I can't wait for it to be over!! A 3-semester-per-year schedule is beneficial for many reasons, but it stinks for many others. Like when all your friends are talking about summer trips, relaxing, etc. and we only get a six-week summer break, not 4 months like they get.

Our summer break is CHOCK FULL, by the way! I love it! The only bad thing about planning a schedule so full is that the break just flies by. We are planning a big trip to Kansas City to see my family (we only get out there once a year...), a day in Salt Lake after we fly back from KC, where we'll take Nathan to the SLC (Hogle) Zoo and do other fun things, drive from there to Gillette, WY to see Mitch's parents, and then eventually come back home. It means living out of the same suitcases for over a month, but we brave it every year and it's always worth it, so why should this year be any different? :o)

Mitch and I have also planned a couple planned mini-trips before the semester ends in two weeks! (Because I guess we're nutso. Or don't plan well. Probably both.)

Mine is for school; a day trip to Salt Lake City where we'll spend the day watching legislation happen at the state level (this Child and Family Advocacy class is a snore sometimes), and then one of the general authorities of our church will speak to our class personally about advocating for families and children(!!!!) This is a HUGE deal because we are a worldwide church with over 14 million members...and this leader is setting aside time to speak to just 30 of us for an hour!! Amazing.

And then there will totally be photo ops afterwards...you BET all my equipment is coming with me! If our teacher can't get a communication/newspaper student to come with us on the trip he is giving that assignment to me. Which is kind of nerve-wracking because they carry around the school's $10,000 lenses, and well, I don't. Oh well, it will still be very fun!

Mitch is planning an overnight scouting trip to scope out the hunting area he's chosen for this year. He's doing the bow hunting and rifle seasons, which he's really excited for. Bow hunting is the hardest, and all school/chore/work breaks around here involve him setting up his target in the backyard and shooting that bow! I don't know a ton of details about the trip, but I'm still trying to convince him not to go alone. It just freaks me out; there are way too many bears, moose, mountain lions, etc. out here for him to be wandering around alone. Oh, wifey anxiety.

Well, I have 1500 pictures sitting patiently, waiting to be edited. I invested in a few more fun camera toys before our KC trip (during which I have 12 shoots booked!), including a battery grip (to hold an extra battery so I don't have to stop and switch when one dies), another memory card (8 gig, 10 speed, we're happy!), and a new lens to allow me to zoom while still getting the blur of the wide aperture that I like. 

Well, that's about it!

Just for your viewing pleasure, here's another throwback to July 2011 and our chubby baby Nathan...man all these newborn shoots and seeing his old pictures make me baby hungry! 

Yes, we have a plan. No it does NOT involve YOU, OR me being pregnant RIGHT NOW. 

So everyone: practice some restraint! Hush and stop asking, it's actually really getting on my nerves!

Having fun in the hot tub at GG and Papa Dooley's house!

Putting on darling Converse shoes a friend gave us :o)

Testing out my newly-acquired backdrops

Learning to crawl!

Testing out my newly-acquired studio light kit (July was a big photography month for me last year, too!)

Thanks for sticking around this long!

Sorry for the brash statement up there about pregnancy. EVERYONE has been asking/hinting lately, and I just can't take it! My first delivery was not like most people's first; there was a good chance we could have lost Nathan and in the last few hours we didn't know if we'd bring home a baby or not. That led to Postpartum Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which led to medication and counseling. Now I am peachy (probably 340 or so days out of the year, which is pretty darn good!), but I am also determined to finish school. With 2 semesters left (and 0 deferrals left), there's no time to take off for a baby. I can hold off a few more months to make it through my Bachelor's Degree.

For not feeling like writing I sure talked some ears (eyes?) off...guess no one expects any differently! I guess I'd always rather write than do homework!

So many changes!

At the beginning or so of this week (yeah, I think it was the 25th), Nathan looked especially patriotic in his red/white/blue plaid shortalls and his red polo (complete with a dark blue stripe around the neck). So, we decided to take 4th of July pictures. I couldn't find the flag I bought last year for our pictures and he wouldn't sit near the red flowers (their texture was a bit overwhelming and "loud" for him...silly...), but we did the best we could. It was a complete opposite of last year's 4th of July pictures, where he was scared of the grass so he wouldn't get off the blanket!

I decided it'd be fun to share a few favorites and compare them with last year's pictures. It still blows my MIND how much they change the first couple years. I see 25 cent baby clothes in 3T size and I just can't make myself buy them (we have the room and empty bins in storage...why not?) because I can't stand the fact that he'll be three one day.

Cue all of you seasoned moms telling me "just wait until..."

Here is my all-time favorite picture of him. I was chasing this crazy kiddo around, adjusting my camera settings to allow a shutter speed of at LEAST 1/600th of a second, and still a balanced histogram no matter how my light was. Which was rough, but we picked a golden time of day, so it all worked out.

 I love this picture of my Nathan. I didn't have to crop it or anything! (Although, from the reflection it looks like my camera is a dinky toy that I'm actually holding normally; it's just a distortion from his little lenses, I promise I wouldn't lie about something as silly as cropping a picture!) <--Message courtesy of my anxiety brain :o) 

At first I didn't like the reflection, and it would be more ideal without it, but I do love that it looks very real-life. I love the light we got on that side of the house, and the white siding made for a very neutral, not-distracting-yet-not-overwhelmingly-white backdrop. He's very "Top Gun" I think. 

Here are some other pictures from this year...I'm saving my favorites to send to grandparents/great-grandparents/aunts & uncles this week, so I don't want to give them all away! I tried to line them up with similar pictures from last year...check out how much this kiddo has changed! My how I miss that uber-round, chubby little baby face!

(Click on the collages to see them bigger; I wanted them to fit in the frame of the blog template!)

Oh, and as a fun detail, I pulled the blue background color for both of these collages right from his eyes in the picture from the 2011 collage (the one on the far left).

We still have a brand new family set of 2012 flag shirts (one of my family's favorite traditions) that we haven't worn yet, but I married a sweet man who just hates having his picture taken.  So we'll see if we even get a picture in the shirts!

I took the 2011 pictures the very first time I used my all-time favorite lens, my "nifty fifty" (50mm 1.8). Ohh I love me some dramatic bokeh! I fell in love with this lens on this little shoot. Look at his shiny eyes! I love how you can't tell he was sitting in front of the nastiest fence on our street (that we happen to share a yard with...yay...) in the 2012 pictures, and a very industrial-looking apartment building in the 2011 ones. This lens has always made our apartments (and their buildings) look way better than they ever have in real life! And that nasty fence has become one of my favorite places to take pictures!

Well that post was much ado about nothing, now wasn't it! Oh well, nothing's really new with us! Mitch is 3 weeks away from his semester off (September-December) and he's SO burnt out, but has been such a trooper! He is currently working 2 jobs and donating plasma when he can. My photography business has boomed, as I have more time on my semester off to dedicate to shoots (i'm only doing 2 credits this semester), so when the studying gets rough, we have the padding in our budget to let him take a week or two off from plasma without it hurting us. I have also been babysitting the 2 sweetest little girls ever, one (8 months) comes 3 times a week and the other (4 months) comes a couple times a month. This allows me to justify staying at home with my boy and not having to find a job on my off semester. 

Nathan is huge and is just busier than ever. If I were to "go, go, go!!" like that all day, every day, I would be dead by the end of the week! I don't know how he has so much energy!

Well, that's us!

Well, it was time for it, so now it's here...

I now have a photography website!! Not just my blog anymore!

I'm SO excited. It took me forever, wasn't very expensive, had kind of difficult website building tools, but it's finally done! I'm glad it was cheap; I searched for a long time to find a good site to use.

For those of you who'd like to know, I used godaddy.com for both the website and domain hosting. It wasn't even into the triple digits! I have friends who have paid several hundred, and we just couldn't spend that much on something intangible, ya know?

I had control over everything but the font of the page titles, which kind of bugged me, but I designed 5 full templates before settling on this one, so by that point I was ready for some compromise. 

Here is the link! 

www.alainadooleyphotos.com

 I wanted to use a simpler URL, like just my name, but my blog is already called alainadooleyphotos, so I wanted to be consistent.

I have always kind of doubted that all of this would take off, so I'm very pleased that I've come this far, and hopefully in a year I'm even further along!

My best friend, Amy, also just got a new SLR after not having one for almost 2 years. She has a 2 year old boy and the only pictures she has of him are from her phone and my camera...this is a girl who would charge $5,000+ for weddings in Utah and was published in 3 national magazines! Needless to say, we're both REALLY excited about her new investment!

The best part is that we get to go into business together! I'm her designated 2nd shooter at weddings, we have different equipment that we can borrow from each other for different types of shoots, and we can babysit each other's kid while the other is on a photo shoot! It is a great setup and I'm feeling so lucky to have a best friend period (I haven't had a true best friend in probably ten years!), let alone one who is in the same phase of life, married with a little toddler boy, and shares my same interests! 

In any case, I'm feeling good right now. And to reward you for listening to my rantings: pictures!

These aren't edited or anything, Nathan was just playing in the window light and I wanted to experiment. They're not supposed to be perfectly exposed, just fun.

Little wrinkly forehead :o)

Love how smooth his skin looks here :o)

Thinkin

Talking to something outside

Well, that's it! We're doing great; life is getting crazy busy and it's hard to come up with the time to do everything! So, sadly, things like donating plasma regularly (Mitch) and running (me) have gone by the wayside...but, our grades are great and so is Nathan, and our house is almost clean half of the time, so...life is good! :o)

Just a little update...

...because I have 3 photo shoots that I need to be editing, and another shoot happening on Monday!

Life is good when it's busy, but then I find myself never taking pictures of my own kiddo, let alone editing any or blogging.

So, since it's been almost a month (yikes!) since my last update, here it goes!

Over Memorial Day weekend we celebrated Mitch's little sister, Jayna, in her accomplishments. She had just found out about a big scholarship to the University of Wyoming, where she will be starting school in the fall. Plus, on Sunday the 27th of May she graduated high school AND turned 18! It was a weekend of fun and family, and we loved it! It was also a nice break from Rexburg...because as much as we love this little town, it's nice to get away sometimes. Even if it's just another by going to another little town! :o)

It was raining the day of graduation and I tried to coax Jayna into letting me take some pictures of her in her cap and gown, but it was purple and she wasn't too convinced that standing out in the rain would be worth it. So, we got a few and called it good :o)

Jayna is a cute little lady--you can see her senior photo shoot here!

Here she is graduating: I know most of you don't know her, but I wanted to post these for parents and grandparents.

 

 I apologize for the poor quality of the photos. I had a fixed zoom lens on my camera, so once I dove onto the floor (I admit, we almost missed her because she walked with the choir, not in alphabetical order!), I was stuck...plus, I'm not really sure I was supposed to be where I was, so I didn't want to sue a flash and get myself in trouble. The harsh, dim indoor light and no flash resulted in a high ISO, which means more graininess...I did the best I could!

Here is Jayna singing with the senior choir during the ceremony.

We love you, Jayna, and we're so proud of you! As much as we wish you were coming to join us at BYU-Idaho, we are so pleased with all you've already achieved at University of Wyoming...especially considering you haven't even started yet! You go, cute girl!!

Nathan did especially well, even though this meant 5-6 hours of sitting still in church clothes...church was from 9 am to 12 pm, then we went home for a quick lunch and left for graduation at 12:30 (his nap time is at ten...) and got home around 3. What a trooper! Here he is giving big hugs to daddy:

 Then we met Jayna outside and all went home.

And there's Jayna's secret boyfriend in the corner, just dying to get a picture with her...just kidding :o)

Nathan REALLY wanted me to pick him up...it was naptime for sure!

 After a good, long afternoon nap we went outside for some hot tub time!

Nathan was NOT a fan at first...

Then he got in his little floatie and started to forget what he was upset about...

 And in this last picture, he's actually laughing!

Then I put the camera down and got in!

More updates to come soon; for now more pictures! My best friend got a new camera and took some really fun pictures of Nathan and I!

They all probably look the same to people, but again, this post is mostly for family :o) 

I was so happy to have these pictures; I never get pictures with my boy! Too bad Mitch doesn't like pictures. (Does he KNOW who he married!? lol) He missed out!

Love his little face in this one! He never makes that face; I love it!

Probably a favorite!

You deserve a gold star if you're still here!