Thursday, January 20, 2011

Putting on the "Alaina" Hat...

Well, hello blogland. I wish I had pictures of my little man to put up, but I don't have a camera cord with me in this state, so it'll have to wait till I get back home to Rexburg.

As some of you know, I've been visiting my family in Kansas City and showing off our son to them. My mom and Camille have met our Nathan, but no one else has. So, when my parents couldn't meet him over Thanksgiving break, they decided to put the gas money they would've spent driving to fly Nathan and me home. I've been here since the 12th and go back the 24th.

The sad part was that we had to leave Mitch behind, because he's in school full-time and working part-time. Yup, too many obligations to embark on a fun, two-week trip halfway across the country! It's been very fun, but weird not having Mitch here!

This trip has left me with time for self-reflection. I was thinking about the "hats" we all wear. I have a daughter hat, a sister hat, a wife hat, and recently added a mom hat to my collection (this, however, doesn't resemble mom jeans in the least!). However, the hat i've left behind is the ALAINA hat. The ME hat.

I don't know how to focus on myself when I have a squirmy, colicky, yet charming and adorable little guy depending on me for everything. When we're both hungry, he gets food. When we're both tired, he gets rocked to sleep. (That reminds me...he should be waking up hungry soon!)

Not that i'm complaining, or at least not intentionally. This is only one of the things i've wanted my entire life! There is nothing more rewarding than seeing my little Nathan smile up at me with the big, dimpled smile that he reserves for his mom :o) It's the best!

I'm just wondering how to work on myself while devoting all my time to Nathan...any suggestions?


5 comments:

  1. well, I've never been a mom...so I don't know how useful this is. But I would say that this completely dependent time of Nathan's will end soon enough, so don't let it worry you about not getting enough time to yourself. On the other hand, if you really need to feel like your old self then schedule it in, you have a great husband and friends who would be willing to help out, even if it's for an hour it would probably do you worlds of good. At the very least, go on a walk either by yourself or with your friend or sister. Oh and by the way, you are a GREAT mother

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  2. Being a new mom is hard isn't it?! I feel the same way most of the time. I barely find time to eat something let alone do my hair or even think about putting on makeup. What I find helps me a lot is first, take your time in the shower. Find a time when Mitch can watch Nathan and really enjoy that time. Or better yet, take a bubble bath ;). Secondly, take a little outing for yourself every once in a while. I was able to go out by myself on Monday and I just did my own this for a couple hours. You would not believe how much it helps!

    You are one brave mom. I would never be able to take care of Jasper all by myself with Mike for 2 weeks!

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  3. Alaina, what I've found in my years of mommy-ing, is that there is so much of yourself to be found in being a mom and giving of yourself to him. Heavenly Father uses our experiences as moms to allow us to become who He wants us to be. That being said, you also need to put yourself somewhere on your list of priorities. (Even if its near the bottom. ;D) And, like Dani said there is a time that it will be easier to re-define Alaina again. You'll find yourself doing this every few months as he grows and things change. (I still find myself doing this) Try and incorporate something you love into every day, even if it's only for 5 minutes. You need to keep your brain alive and happy. :D You can do this, you are a great mom!

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  4. Ditto, ditto, ditto Heather's comment. She said it better then I ever could, but that's exactly what I was thinking :)

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  5. I'm still trying to figure this out, but I've found that sometimes I just have to take time for myself. Even if the dishes aren't done or toys are scattered all over the floor I try to take time to do a few things for myself during nap time or after she goes to bed (like doing a work out video and showering if I'm lucky or sewing something). I'm much happier when I do especially since the apartment will just get messed up again the next day or when she wakes up. My husband knows I'm happier when I do it too, so he's ok with having a little messier of an apartment if I'm happy. Sometimes I also try to do the things I love with Ava. I play the piano and she stands at the piano bench(since she can now pull herself to standing) and hits the high keys. She has fun and I have fun too or I listen to my favorite music with her. You can't do everything with him, but a few of these things still make me feel like me.

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